Eliminate the Self-absorbed Sidekicks and Emotional Vampires

A recent study found that 8 in 10 people deal with "self-absorbed sidekicks and emotional vampires" aka toxic friends. It's usually in our 20somethings when we start to reassess our friendships. We start to realize that having those toxic friends can have a huge impact on our health--the stress in itself can lead to unhealthy behaviors.

Not sure if you have a toxic friend? If you answer 'yes' to any of the questions below, it's time to consider just how much you want that friend around:

• Does your friend constantly talk about herself/himself without even taking 5 seconds to think about you or anyone else?
• Does your friend constantly complain about every single little thing?
• Does your friend criticize everything you do? Even when you're not asking for their advice?
• Does your friend throw little insults your way?
• Does your friend try to boss you around? And do they throw a 'temper tantrum' if you don't take their "advice"?
• Does it seem like your friend is never around or available to actually be a friend unless they need a favor?

If so, they gotta go! It's not easy getting rid of a toxic friend. At some point, you had a positive experience with them, so they weren't always toxic--but as many of us continue on the 20something path, we tend to change. Some because more "me, me, me" while others start to appreciate the amazing people they have in their life. If you want to have lifelong friendships, you have to keep the right ones around, starting now! Below are a few tips to do it with class:

• Put your time and energy on things that make you happy, i.e. friends, hobbies, family, etc.
• Don't feel pressured to return the phone calls and texts. By minimizing the communication, the friend should start to get the hint.
• Be blunt: Tell them in a letter how they feel, but by doing this, you should be fair and see if they are willing to stop being so toxic. If they are a real friend, they'll listen to what you say. If not, they'll be happy to move along.
• Set boundaries! Perhaps only spend time around that person in a group setting, or keep the conversation within the real of Facebook.

Bottom line:  Some of you may not agree with the advice above, so figure out what works best for you. Just remember, life is short, time is precious, and friendships should be special. No one should literally drain the energy and positivity out of you. I can tell you from personal expierence that it's not easy, but it's totally worth it in the end. When you get rid of a toxic friend, you feel a huge weight lifted off your shoulders, a weight you didn't even realize you've been carrying around. It's pretty fabulous!